Elissa was already at the house when I came up the street, with Bo on leash. Once inside, I gathered my things and we hit the road. Driving up to Cambridge, we chatted. I was excited about the run, about the cold day, and the idea of running what was, to me, so far. Mostly, however, I was excited about the lack of wind.

We parked near the Elliot Bridge, and stretched a little. Tried to find a bathroom, to no avail. Then we took off running, out to Watertown on the Cambridge Side. We kept the pace slow and steady, running and talking, laughing about random stuff, chugging along. It felt like we were moving really slow and by the time we hit Mt. Auburn St, our turnaround point and the end of the path, I was feeling good, but wanting to pick it up a little. We crossed the bridge at a walk, had some Gatorade, then began running again. The Boston side was really sunny, and felt a little more difficult because of it. Miles 4 and 5 passed quickly, and then we had to take a pit stop. A few minutes later we were back in business. Mile 6, done.

“Only 3 more,” I said to Elissa. “This is going to be easy.”

I could hear her breathing a little harder. She’d had a late night and not much sleep, was determined to finish, but she was tired. We’ve all been there. “Only 2.5 more,” I said, and we kept going.

Soon we were at the Anderson bridge, and headed back towards the car. Only 1 mile to go. And then, just like that, we were back at the car.

I wish I had a more colorful description for this run, or more interesting stories to share, but I was just enjoying running, our conversation, the sunlight, the occasional breeze that passed over us. The water on the river was so blue, standing out against the muted greens and browns of the riverbanks – that, I remember.

I don’t know. I didn’t disassociate from the run itself, like I tend to do when I’m by myself and have my headphones on, but I didn’t really focus on the run, either. I was just kind of… present.

Afterwards, some stretching, then brunch at Zoe’s. It was a meal that we earned.

Nine miles. That’s the farthest I’ve ever run.

One of the things that gets discussed a lot in the relationship is the issue of children. More specifically, the issue of birth control. Last year, it was decided that Rob was going to see his doctor, get a referral, and make the appointment for the big V.

Of course, that never happened, and come February, I got a new Rx for birth control. Only this time I tried something new (for me), the Nuvaring.

So let me tell you how that went.

At first, it was great. I loved the convenience of it. I loved not having to remember to take a pill every day. I loved knowing that I was not going to get knocked up. I can’t even tell you how much I enjoyed that part. But after a few weeks, I started having some pretty severe side effects. Unfortunately I attributed them to my increased training, travel and other work-related stresses.

For starters, I began to have dozens of tiny little bumps all over my forehead. My skin began to get really oily. I thought all the sweating during my lunchtime runs (and my lackadaisical post-run facial regime) was to blame.

Next came the inability to sleep through the night. Work stress, travel, etc. This is what I thought was messing up my sleep. Oh, and night sweats. I had those, too. Gross, but I thought that maybe it was just too warm in our room at night.

Then came the fatigue. I thought I was working too hard, running too much, or some other thing, but I was tired all the time, even after sleeping for 8 hours. I took naps every weekend – multiple hour naps.

Finally, there were the mood swings. Again, being tired and not sleeping well can definitely contribute to irritability, but holy crap. If someone looked at me sideways on the T, I was ready to grab them by the throat. No lie.

And that is when I realized, at long last, that there was something really, really wrong. So I took it out.

Twelve hours later, I slept through the night. When I woke up, I didn’t feel completely exhausted. I felt happy and calm on my way into work. I wasn’t ready to kill anyone for cutting me off or accidentally bumping into me on the T. I can’t even tell you how, a mere 24 hours later, I feel totally different. It’s almost as if I had forgotten what it was to feel normal and good.

Isn’t that f*cked up? I mean, honestly.

So anyway, I think Rob finally realized that I’ve been suffering and is calling to schedule an appointment tomorrow. Freaking finally.

This was supposed to be my cutback week, where I ran 4, 3, 4, and 5. On Friday, however, I felt awful – swollen glands, sore throat, general malaise, no appetite – so I bagged my lunchtime run, worked through lunch, drank a ton of herbal tea, and went home early, with the plan of doing an 8 miler on Saturday.

I talked it over with a few runner friends, who assured me that it was OK to move my schedule around, provided that I was feeling good with regard to my legs, hips, and feet. Running 8 on Saturday would bump my long run up by one more mile, but still have me down in mileage for the week, and I could do my cutback week next week,  then go to 9 miles the following weekend.

Friday night I stayed in, drank more fluids, ate some pasta with eggplant and some garlic bread, and went to bed early, maybe 9:30pm. I was a little nervous about my run and my route, but I tried to think about how well I had done last week’s run, and how good I felt, and how – just after starting back into this after injury – 6 miles seemed so hard and unreachable, and now it was something I’ve done time and again.

At 7:15 am, which is an unbelievably late rising time for me, Bo and I headed out for our walk. Coffee at 8, along with a little bowl of Cheerios w/soy milk, a spoonful of PB, and some water. I checked my email, sorted the mail, paid a few bills, and read a few blogs, then got dressed and hit the road.

Two things about Saturday’s run that were notably different from last Sunday’s:

1. Last week was cool and cloudy, while Saturday was sunny and somewhat cold, but only when the wind was blowing.
2. The mile that I added contained a huge hill that took me by surprise.

That said, I felt a little overdressed and on the too-warm side, and had to walk about half of that steep hill. The good thing, though, was that the run was good overall, and I didn’t feel totally dead at the end. I was tired, but not completely spent. Again, I stopped at CVS for a Gatorade, then walked up the hill to the house.

For my 9 miler, I am going to need to carry some water & Gatorade. I have (somewhere) a Fuel Belt, but it has never fit me properly, so I am looking for something else that sits a little more comfortably on my hips. Or perhaps a larger size Fuel Belt that doesn’t ride up. :)

Anyway, I’m feeling good and not having any real physical problems, as I have in the past. I’ve just started rolling my ITB and stretching my hip flexors, as well as trying to strengthen my quads and hip abductors, just to be safe and get rid of the little twinges before they become bigger issues.

More importantly, I feel so happy and proud of how I’ve logged my miles in the last few weeks, being flexible on days I needed to, and running in all sorts of crazy weather. Spring is coming (the crocuses are just starting to flower) and I’m already so far ahead of where I thought I’d be by now. Let’s just hope that things continue in a relatively even manner.

I’d be happy with that.

I love good food, as anyone who reads this blog or knows me well can attest. I love bright green produce and luscious fruit, savory sauces and sugary desserts. I love the texture in food – crunchy, chewy, smooth, hearty. And I love that feeling of having prepared something that looks beautiful and tastes amazing. I love the feeling of being comforted and nourished, and of comforting others, too.

What I don’t love is agribusiness, chemicals and preservatives, disregard for the environment, and inhumane treatment of animals. It is something that weighs on my conscience daily, and I spend a lot of time researching companies and products, looking for not only responsibly made, sustainably farmed products, but good quality products that I like and will happily use because they are awesome, not just because of how they are produced.

Yesterday, one of the ladies from our PR firm was talking about the book Skinny Bitch, and sharing with me the tidbits about how milk is pus and how you need to be vegan to be healthy, and talked a little bit about how animals are cruelly treated, and so on. And my first reaction to the bit about the animals was “duh”. I mean, commercial meat production is hardly a bucolic business.

While I grew up in Cleveland, OH, that area is surrounded by farms. My aunt & uncle had enough land to have horses and a couple of cows, some chickens, and rabbits. Other than the cows, butchering could be done at home. There were many Amish farms around, and there was a respect for the animals who provided you with meat, dairy and eggs. I know what it means to raise animals for food, having spent many summers with my relatives on the farm. I also know that agribusiness is the exact opposite of what I experienced.

So anyway, I was a vegetarian for about 8 years, and vegan for about a year. When I went back to eating meat, it was in a limited quantity. I didn’t often prepare it at home, and usually chose to eat a pasta or vegetable-based dish when I went out. But then Rob and I started dating, and it all went downhill from there. I don’t blame Rob for my choices, but I’ve definitely slid back into some old habits because it’s easier to cook one meal instead of 1.5 or 2 every night. Rob also tends to like foods that are comforting, like roasts and stews. Not to mention the grilling and BBQing that he does during the summer.

So, what to do? How do we eat with a clear conscience, feel comforted by what we prepare, enjoy the foods that we both love, and make use of our somewhat limited spare time? We have to figure something out because being a lapsed vegetarian is weighing on my conscience like a huge, heavy stone.

Last night we had a big discussion about it, and came to an understanding about why we need to cut down on the amount of meat that comes into this house, and when we do have it, it needs to be from local places that practice humane methods of farming.

I know that it’s not a perfect solution, but it’s a step in the right direction for us, and hey, everyone does what they can. We do a lot with regard to the environment – composting, growing some of our own vegetables in the warm months, carpooling & using public transportation for our commute, biking to run errands, using compact fluorescent bulbs, recycling, freecycling or donating things instead of throwing them away, trying to not buy things we don’t really need, monitoring our energy use closely, bringing coffee in a travel mug, etc – but we are not perfect, and we could do more.

The good news is that we did find several places around here where we can get what we want either as a CSA or as a special order. And there is Lionette’s in the South End, who sell quality product, humanely raised.

Tonight we are having Chop Suey, made with napa cabbage, shittake mushrooms and yes, baked tofu. Rob said he is going to try it, which is a big step for him. This makes me unbelievably happy.

So at noon, I am off to Whole Foods (whole paycheck) to pick up the veggies we need. Bring on spring and the farmers markets, I say, because eating this way can be very, very expensive… but worth it in the long run, I think.

I’ve been noticing that, as I get older, the days and months seem to move faster. Pretty soon, it’s April. Whoops, here comes July. Wait, what happened? It’s December already? Yes, that’s pretty much how it goes lately. *sigh*

That said, I need to get a handle on what I want to do this year because, hell, it’s almost April! Or Q2 for you business nerds.

Looking at the year thus far, however, makes me happy. I have my long run up to 7 miles now (more on that later). I’ve mostly finished a couple of knitting projects and should be done with them in the next few weeks. Work is going well, and I feel like I’ve figured out what I’m good at there and how I fit in to the team. Things at home are good. Rob and I are really good. So yeah. Yay and woo for all that.

But looking forward, what am I doing? What do I want to do? I have to figure this out. I’d like to take another class at Harvard, and maybe one at the Museum School. I need to run a half this year, and will in May, as long as the wheels don’t fall off the bus. We need to start working on our kitchen, which will be a PITA, but totally worth it in the end. I’d also like to do some more sewing. Maybe this weekend I can work on that a bit.

I guess that this goal-setting and introspection comes from turning 36 on Saturday, and looking ahead to the coming year, as well as looking ahead to 40, which feels like it is right around the corner.

Sunday was my long run and I knocked out 7 miles pretty easily at a decent pace. What this tells me is that:

• I’ve been running my shorter runs too slow and am capable of going faster.
• My consistency has been paying off big time.
• I can run the half in May, with my goal being just to finish and set a baseline for a fall half (or the NHRR, pace-wise).
• I’m a real runner now. This seems funny, because I’ve been running for over 4 years, but this is the first time I’ve really felt like I can do anything I set my mind to.

On Sunday, after my run, Rob and I were headed over to meet some friends for lunch, and we were talking about my running and how I’d been really dedicated to putting in my miles and getting my long run up. I confessed my feelings about finally being a real runner, and mentioned that I’d like to do a marathon before I turn 40. Not believing that those words came out of my mouth, I started laughing so hard that I cried and then whisphered, “and I think I can do it.”

I was trying to remember, because I am writing this offline, from somewhere over Nevada I believe, when my last blog entry was and what I wrote about. It was probably something about how cold and windy it was in Boston, which tends to be my area of interest lately. I’m so interested, in fact, that I plan to get a shirt made that says “Wind Sucks” to wear while running along the Charles, although my friend Jill pointed out that “Wind Blows” would be more appropriate.

And speaking of wind, and blowing, and sucking (ho ho!) my long run on Sunday did both, because of – guess what – the wind. I swear, I have never earned 6 miles in my logbook the way I did on Sunday. It was also alternately freezing and hot, so I was both under and overdressed on the same run. HO-LY.

But this week! This week was different and new and shiny, because I ran in San Francisco where it was warm(er) and lovely, apart from all the concrete. At a minimum it was fantastic because:

• I’d never run there before, even though I’ve been there dozens of times.
• The time had just changed and I was running in the dark, but got to see the sun coming up over the Easy Bay.
• The weather was perfect, and on a related note,
• I wore shorts! M*therf*cking yeah!

We stayed in Union Square, so it was easy to run down Sutter to Market, then down to the Embarcadero and around there, and back again. The first day, I went left at the Ferry Building and down almost to Bay Street before turning around. The second day, I had less time, so I went right and down to the Bay Bridge and turned around there.

I took a slightly different route back each day, and on the first, the hill back was shorter but steep, coming up Powell. On the second day, I ran back up Sutter which was a longer, more gradual hill. I have to say that I disliked them both equally because hills suck, and f*ck them, you know? What’s their problem, anyway?

But now I’m on my way back and don’t have to run again until Friday, when I will try to squeeze 4 miles in before my 1:00 meeting, and where it will probably be raining, or worse yet snowing, and definitely windy because that’s how we roll in Boston, yo.

Yesterday was nice. No doubt about that. But it’s not, you know, spring.

Last night I happened to be looking at my Flickr account and I came across the photo at left. *sigh* I cannot wait for spring, honestly. I just wish it would hurry up a little.

That said, today it was supposed to be warm. It may be warm now – I don’t know, because I am an office monkey – but at noon, I froze my ass off. A smarter person would have noted the wind gusts on Accuweather, or brought gloves along, or worn a warmer shirt.

Anyway, 3 miles done, and I think I ran a little faster than my usual plod. Woo! Nice way to start the week.

Oh. And. My friend Jen entered the lottery for the Mt. Washington Road Race. I cracked up when I visited their web site where it states “there is only one hill.” Riiiiiiight, only one hill. Nevermind that the hill is over 7 miles long with a 5000+ foot climb. This proves that runners are crazy and optimistic. :)

Summary:
Week 2 of training for my half. The bad news: I blew off a 3 mile run because I was a little hungover. The good news: I ran 6 miles instead of 5 on my long run, and it didn’t even feel that difficult until right at the end. So, yay me.

Long version:
We had really strange weather yesterday. It snowed an inch or two overnight, and then really started to come down in the morning, while I was out walking Bo with the regulars at the park. Sometime around noon it stopped, but it had warmed up so much that not much was sticking to the roads and everything was already melting. By 3:30, the sun had come out and I hit the road.

I kept my pace WAY down for the first 2 miles, which was hard. Running painfully slow, jogging, actually, felt weird and I’m sure I looked ridiculous. After I turned left onto the parkway, I started to pick it up a little, and ran just over my 10K race pace for a while.

At mile 5, which was right near the house, I decided that I felt good enough to run another mile so I continued on and made a little loop down to the other parkway and back up the hill towards home. It was gorgeous and not too cold. The sun was out and the clouds were moving. The weather was changing again, but I was headed home. It really had been a perfect run.

Coming into the house, I could hear the sounds of Rob’s poker game getting underway. I went upstairs and stretched a bit (but not enough), and took a shower. Later, I came down and fixed myself a bowl of chili and opened up a beer, sat on the couch and thought “I can’t wait to write about this wonderful day.”

This is why I run.

I’ll be traveling for work next week, and possibly the week after. Guess I’ll be bringing my gear with me so that I can train while on the road. At least the weather is nice in the bay area. I can wear shorts!

At the end of the month, I may be speaking at a conference in Michigan about design best practices for RIAs, presenting some case studies, etc. I’m a little nervous about it, my my coworker, David, says that I will be great. He’s so kind.