In my past post, I wrote about art-making and not much about running. Thanks, everyone, for sharing your stories with me. Just reading those made me feel even more that I am doing the right thing. I feel very, very fortunate that my parents have always encouraged me (my mom has an MFA in Ceramics, so that helps, and my dad was just happy I went to college, something he was not able to do), and eventually I hope to encourage someone else who maybe doesn’t have that same family support that I’ve had.

But anyway.

Just got back from a nice little 3 mile run with Rob. We spent all morning drinking coffee and talking, watching both the Red Sox parade and the drizzle outside. I did some laundry, caught up with Christine, who is back from Paris, and then we came down to his house to run. Soon we are going to eat barbeque, then get into costumes and head off to Caitlin’s Hallowe’en party. I’m going as a Fairy Goth Mother, and Rob is going as himself, since he hates dressing up.

I guess that there will be a lot of runners at this party tonight. The invitation says something about high-carb treats, and is very anti-Atkins in nature (sort of like the burger with double-buns cookout I went to a while back).

So I don’t know what’s going on with me, but I’ve just been in a really good mood lately. Maybe it’s the running, or maybe it’s painting, or just… having a sense of purpose or a goal. I don’t feel stuck anymore. Instead, I feel like I am running towards something full force, and I’m really confident about grad school right now. It’s a good feeling.

That said, I don’t have a lot of running goals right now, and you know, that is okay. My main goal is really to run 3 – 4 times per week, and I have been sticking to that. I have only been covering about 3 miles each time, but I feel good and that’s all I have time for right now. When I have more time to give to running, I’ll do more. It’s pretty simple.

Anyway, I am off to eat some tasty barbeque. Run on, friends. Run on.

Oh my God. I am so tired.

These last couple of weeks have been hard, what with the Red Sox in, you know, the World Freakin’ Series and all, but today. Today! Ugh. I am dragging. I think all these late nights and long working hours have finally done me in.

Or maybe it was the giant turkey sandwich I had for lunch. But whatever, I am ready to fall asleep at my desk right now.

The good news is, I’ve been doing a little running, and getting my portfolio ready for graduate school. I have a lot of work to do on the painting and application front, but I am making progress. Running has actually been quite helpful during this process. Not only to I get the time to work out my plan and what I’m going to say on my statement of intent, I get the release that running brings.

And that brings up a related point, but this is about art-making, so feel free to skip if you are so inclined.

My friend Jodi and I were talking about Open Studios, and that we liked having people come through and see where we actually make our work, because it really demystifies the whole art-making process. It also demonstrates that, for most artists, art-making is a serious job and a real struggle. It’s not some romanticized thing where I go to the studio and make my art, and all of my stress is relieved when I paint, and blah blah blah. No, that’s what running is for. And running is a hobby. Art is my job.

Anyway, I mention this because the other day, my coworker, who I usually think of as being cool and laid back and one of those low-maintenance moms, said something to me about how her daughter wants to be an artist. “Cool,” I thought. Then she went on to tell me how she started saying things like “now Jenny, it’s okay to like art and do art, but you can do other things with your life and still draw,” meaning “you’ll never make any money at it, so it’s not worth pursuing.”

I have to admit, I was a little taken aback. Also, this coworker didn’t know that I have been planning on leaving my corporate job and going back for my MFA in Painting, so her comments were more than just a little offensive to me. I think my response was something to the effect of “well, there are lots of jobs she can do that are related to art – like architecture, or interior design, or textile design, or museum studies, or preservation management, or graphic design & illustration” because I tend to be more diplomatic at the office than I am outside of it. Her response? “Oh no. She needs to have a serious career.”

Uh. Yeah. She’s 7.

That was when I told her that I was going back to school to get my MFA and to make painting my real career. Further, my parents never discouraged me as a kid, and I turned out just fine. And another thing – my sister wanted to be a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader when she was 7 and she turned out fine, too. I mean, most kids want to be ridiculous things when they’re little – like my friend’s 6 year old son. who wants to be a fighter pilot AND a hairdresser, mostly because he likes to cut the hair off of his sister’s Barbies, much to her consternation. But to tell a 7 year old that making art isn’t a valid profession is just… dumb.

“So what, exactly, is wrong with being an artist,” I asked. “I’m very curious to know.” Okay, I take back that part about me being diplomatic at work. That was, apparently, a bold faced lie.

Anyway, this is what I’ve been thinking about all weekend. Chris’ post about being a serious runner made me think about being “serious” in the context of making art, and about how that seriousness is perceived in the world. Painters and runners = crazy, evidently.

Who knew?

I have the biggest baseball hangover. Evah!

Going to bed at 1am when you’ve been up late almost every night for a week, and have a meeting in the morning, and have an after work run planned… oof. That’s rough.

All I have to say is, wow. That was the biggest choke in the history of baseball. Great job, Yankees! (snicker)

Hey, what’s the difference between a Yankee Stadium hot dog and a Fenway frank?
Next week you’ll be able to get a Fenway frank! :)

What a difference a few days makes. I have to admit, I was feeling a little wonky after Tufts. My quads were sore – damn bridges – but my ITB was totally, 100% fine (go figure) so I took a swim yesterday, and didn’t run until today.

I had been IMing with Dianna a bit and was anxious for the clock to hit 4:30 so I could head out. Lately, I’ve been feeling anxious about my runs (the few I’ve actually managed to get in), putting a lot of pressure on myself that doesn’t really need to be there. Maybe it was the stress of knowing my first 10K was coming up, and that I hadn’t trained well. I don’t know, but it’s been making me not like running very much.

But today was different. There was no pressure of a big race coming up, it was cloudy and cool, and I was feeling optimistic, so out the door I went.

It was windy. Gosh, it was windy. Still, I had fun. The bridges still kind of sucked, but only because I’m rusty at running them. In a few weeks, it will be no big deal. Truthfully, they weren’t that big of a deal. They were just annoying, and I can live with that.

Anyway, I had told Dianna that all I wanted to do was go out and have a good run, then post about it. My needs are simple, really. :)

Okay, I’m back. I had a great time at the race. It was really well organized, and the port-o-potties were super clean when I used them about a half hour before the race. Imagine that! Volunteers were everywhere and very knowledgeable about where things were. I dropped my bag at the bag check area and milled around a bit.

We seeded ourselves in the 9:00 milers, because 10:00 and up included all the walkers and ladies with strollers, and I didn’t want to get stuck behind them. Remarkably, most people lined up where they were supposed to, and you didn’t see a lot of recreational walkers up front. That was cool.

Everyone was hooting and hollering and waving at the television cameras. The horn sounded and off we went, into a shuffle. It’s a beautiful day here – cool and sunny, with a nice wind to cool you as you run up and over the Longfellow bridge into Cambridge. Most of the race is on the Cambridge side of the river and it was pleasant enough. I got through the first 4 miles easy, running on the slow side, but still running the entire time. Back over the bridge, into Boston. Doo de doo de doo…

Then I hit mile 5.

My whole left leg totally cramped. And my ass cramped. I almost had to sit down, it hurt so bad. I stopped, stretched, walked… ran.. nope. So I walked from mile 5, almost to 6. Every time I tried to run, I cramped up again and hobbled. Right before mile 6 I thought, “fuck it. I’m running.” So I shuffled along and ran around the public garden, onto Charles Street. The finish line was right up ahead, and I was hurting. A lady in front of me slowed to walk and I said, “Want to run in with me? You can do it. Don’t walk now!” She smiled and started running again.

I crossed the line with a 1:17 chip time. So slow, but honestly, I don’t care. I’m just happy I finished and enjoyed myself (despite the cramping). Tufts is a wonderful race, and I had to sit out last year because I was hurt. This year, I’m healthy. Next year, I’ll shatter that time. :)

Well, this is it. I’m at the office, just a short train ride away from the starting line. Rita, Janet and I are heading down there at 10:45. Right now I’m IMing with Dianna about her marathon and getting generally psyched up. Good times.

I’m really, really feeling good about this race, and I know I can do it now. I visualized the whole course this morning and I’m confident and happy. Attitude is everything, and mine is good – real good.

So, like I said, this is it.
I’ll get back to you after my first 10K!!!

Well, it’s that time of year again – Autumn, my favorite time to run in the woods. Really, I should run in the woods all the time, but in the spring I like being around a lot of people, drawing energy from our collective effort on the rail trails and Charles River paths. But in the autumn, and well into winter, I prefer to run off-road, just me and the leaves, an occasional walker or mountain biker, and the crisp, clear air all around me. When the snow comes, I bring out my snowshoes. Simple, really.

So today I spent some time looking for a new map of the Middlesex Fells, one of my favorite places to run trails & fire roads. The Fells is huge, as you can see from this map, and offers many choices for running. It’s really a wonderful place.

Tonight, however, I have a 7pm meeting, so I’m hitting the Charles after work and avoiding rush hour traffic (because I am smart), but Friday night I may try to convince Rob to head out there with me and run a little in the woods.

Saturday I’m headed to Hartford for Dianna’s marathon. I believe that I am to be stationed at Mile 15, equipped with a Green Apple PowerGel (got it), motrin, and Body Glide. I can’t wait, and I just have to say this I am so proud of her!!! Seriously, she rocks. Give it up for Dianna, now.

And speaking of giving it up, my friend Felix ran his first 5K last weekend – the Kerouac 5K, in Lowell. Felix just started running a few months ago, using the C25K program on CoolRunning.com, and he did great. All the Lowell peeps are so proud of him, and I know he’s proud of himself. He should be.

As for Tufts, one of the women at my office who was planning on running may drop out. She’s nursing an ITB injury and doesn’t feel like dealing with the race if it rains. Ah well. So it goes. It doesn’t really matter much to me anyway, because she’s a lot faster than I am and we weren’t planning on running together. Plus, with 10,000+ women, it’s sure to be a great event for everyone, with no one really running alone. :)

So I’m getting back to a regular routine these days, and not just with running. It seems like things are about to pick up again, but not at the pace I’d previously been holding, and I am definitely figuring out what I don’t want to do, so it feels like I’m getting somewhere and sorting things out in my head.

Running has been really helpful for that. Last night I went out for a short run and it turned into 4.5 miles. Pretty good, considering I haven’t been out in a few days and had been struggling for weeks. I mean, it was hard, but I had a lot to think about and was distracted, further proving that any difficulties I have up to the 6 mile distance are mostly mental, especially when I’m properly fueled and hydrated at the time.

I spent some time thinking about graduate school again and all the programs I am looking at for my MFA, and also thought hard about my artist statement and what my art is about (something I have to address in my applications). I honestly think that sometimes artists are successful, or at least recognized, not because their art is so great, but because they know how to discuss it intelligently.

Anyway, after 15 minutes or so of mulling over all the snippets of text I had in my head, it finally came together a bit more. Basically, my work is about growing up midwestern, and the ideas & expectations about life and love that come from that background. There’s an element of abstract landscape to it, and I’ve been trying to figure out how to fit that part into my description, too.

So there I was, thinking about the midwest and what it means to be here in the Northeast, growing up, coming into my own, thinking about fields and flatlands of Ohio and whatnot, and this sentence came to me. “As a runner and a triathlete, I spend hours on the roads looking at the horizon, inventing stories and characters that become the subjects of my paintings. Those flatlands of midwest, memories of my true home, provide inspiration and give visual context to my work.”

Well, it’s not quite there yet, but that’s a draft of where I’m going with it. I think there’s something there. Pulling it all together is the hard part. I’m running again on Wednesday after work, so I have plenty of time to think it through some more.

Oh. And!

I knitted this pumpkin hat for my nephew and my sister sent this picture today of him wearing it. So cute!!!!!

Well, that’s all for now, running peeps. I finally feel as if I am one of you again, back in the fold, so to speak. :)